Bear with me for a moment, I need to complain. But before that I want to gloat just a bit. Yesterday at church I was working in the children's room. As far as I can tell I am the only male at Hawthorne who is in there, at least on a regular basis (last three weeks in a row and I think next week). We had some new kids yesterday and the week before that, ranging in age from 3 to 10 years. I talked to all of them (thus begins the gloating). All of them (excpet for one kid, who was really loud and, um, spirited) were timid and shy and reluctant to participate. I can relate! I am timid and shy and reluctant to participate and when I was their age I would have RUN AWAY rather than be put in a kid's room with people I didn't know. So, I gently, carefully, thoughtfully eased my way into their little protective bubbles and by the end of our time they were participating. I was really pleased that they felt comfortable enough to particpate and proud that I was able to help them feel that way.
And now the complaint. As I mentioned, I am the only male over 7 years old who is in there on a regular basis. When the gathering was over and all the mommies came to pick up their children, each and every one of them either looked at me a bit oddly or simply not at all, and this is when I was still playing with their children. Clearly I am working with their wee one, and yet they seek out the closest woman to ask how it went and to thank them for their hard work and yada yada. Hello! Do you see me?! I'm the one with your child! I even wiped snot off of one of their little noses!
Ok, as I have admitted before, I tend to be a bit sensitive about some things, this being one of them. But really, it's not as if I don't have good reason. There is a paper towel commercial that I see every now and then that is clearly aimed for the lady of the house, sympathizing with her about how she has to clean up after her kids and lamenting that husband's do such horrible work that the wife must inevitably come behind him and reclean.
I have more examples, but I know that complaining gets old so I'll stop (in a minute). Ladies, do not assume that we (guys) are big, dumb puppies when it comes to children and house work; and when we do a good job, as we (and you) should be expected to do, please don't act like we're dancing poodles.
Ok, I'm done. You can bring your kid over now-I'll watch him for you.
13 hours ago
2 comments:
I think it is amazing that you help out in the kids room. I always wondered why more men didn't do so or why it became something only women do.
It is weird to think that gender typecasting still goes on today. Just as you were offended that the paper towel commercial was geared towards women, I found myself thinking while reading "Why can't men use paper towels too? Is it because in our society women still do the shopping and cleaning?" A modern day commercial typecasting.
I spent my sunday watching a few classic movies, that feed into the male chauvinist brute type, and female emotional helplessness type that was most definitely separated in that day. Maybe future generations will look back at our media and see the same?
Sorry you don't get the recognition you deserve
-Tierney
Tierney reads my blog! Yay! I was just ranting, it's really not about the recognition per say, it's just that I like to talk about your kids too! Anyway, you are very right about the gender typecasting. It's a struggle, and a worthy one I think, to try and figure out what the real differences between the genders are, and enjoy those differences (as opposed to make fun of them), while minimizing as best we can the societal influences on how a girl or boy is "supposed" to be. Now that I have a daughter it's something I think about a lot more.
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